Sunday, May 30, 2010

Shirley Feeney Determined Fit To Stand Trial


After much thought, Milwaukee District Attorney Hosensepher has deemed Shirley Feeney fit to stand trial of the assault of Andrew "Squiggy" Squigmont. Feeney had through a bowling ball on his foot and pasta in his face at The Pizza Bowl. On a violent rampage she then tried to club her landlord Edna Babbish in the head with a baseball bat.
Her Attorney Schlemiel Schmozel claimed she was under undue stress to her Boo-Boo kitty being decimated by Squigmont, and her boyfriend Carmine "The Big Ragu" Ragusa dumping her for not putting out.
Laverne Dafazzio has posted bail,as Feeney remains no flight risk. Her trial is set for late December back in 63.

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